Prayer works!!!

After applying for a Para job at a nearby district at the end of the last year, waiting a month to get turned down, being asked if I was interested in another para position about 4 months later, doing 2 interviews and waiting another month or so.......I GOT MY DREAM JOB AT A GREAT SCHOOL!!!!!! This school has higher API scores, gave me a great job, and are going to transfer the girls into the district. After weeks of worry and LOTS of prayer I decided that if they couldn't transfer the girls in then I wouldn't take the job. I have been there for my girls for every moment since they were born and I wasn't about to stop now. Something as little as dropping them off and picking them up from school means a lot to me! After finding out I'll have personal days to use in the event of a Track Meet, Play, or any special event I don't want to miss I was more in love with the job offer. But after finding out that the school was overflowing with students and wasn't able to accept any more transfers it was hard for me to give up the idea of taking my girls to school like I've done for so long now. So I emailed my contact and explained my torn emotions. How shocked was I when she called me a week later saying they crunched the numbers and could take the girls!!! The only hang up about the job was solved....obviously a move from Gods hand. Something that was impossible weeks before was now being done. I have no doubt in my whole body that God gave me the words to impress them and gave them the desire to have me and my girls.
While it hurts that the girls won't grow up Wildcats like we all did I feel better knowing I have the approval of the Lord and that they will get the best education opportunities available.

And I get to take them to school every single day.

Am I crazy?

A little sin has to be answered for just like a big sin but dadgumm some people see how far they can strech it! I don't want to have to answer for my stuff, I can't imagine standing in front of God answering to Him about some of the things people do. I don't understand how some people don't even TRY to serve the Lord or who say they do and yet do some of the most bizzare things! You would think that if Christ was in your heart you wouldn't be doing such satinistic things. I'm a sinner just like everyone else, difference is I TRY to live for Christ and sometimes I fall and do something I'm going to have to answer for, I don't walk around acting as stupid as possible and not giving a care one min. then proclaim that I'm a Christian in the next. I'm on a sopabox about this I know, but am I the only one who thinks that some people are NUTS!?

Gary Allan!!!

*Sigh* I'm missing Gary like an ex boyfriend. That was the best night ever! I've listened to his songs for so long now but to be there a few feet away singing with him in Paul arms......*deep breath*.....it doesn't get any better than that. It really changes how you feel about the music. I've heard live bands before but it's not the same as loving the songs for years (as long as I can remember) and always wondering what it would be like to watch them sing it with all THEIR emotion and life experience behind it. Gary's songs are so real and raw anyway because they are mostly about "learning how to bend" after the death of his wife Angela. Those songs have gotten me through some dark days (none like his) but just the same I can relate to hurt on his face and in his voice when he sings. It's magic, and we're planning our next concert now. I will never miss another Gary Allan concert at Eufaula and can't believe I've missed the last ones. Paul is the best hubby ever! As soon as I found out Gary was going to be this close to the house I started to whine...LOL and just like he did for our Valentines dance in High School he said no. I believe his words then were" I'm not going to no dance" and his words this time were" I'm not standing in no crowd". Then, just like so many years ago, he hands me a card and tickets fall out. *insert bursting into tears* and the best feeling ever. My prince spoils me every chance he gets. I am so blessed to have him as my husband.

Sigh.

I've lost my will to blog about my day to day. I'm super busy with the end of my school year and the school year for the girls. My teeth are hurting like a migraine right now and I'm attempting to start a helpful blog as opposed to my personal blog. Don't ask me why just feel like it. I've recently discovered that once again I can not trust anyone other than myself. I don't know why I give people the benefit of the doubt and trust them with my deepest thoughts and concerns. It makes it very hard for me to be kind and nice to people when I keep getting stabbed in the back. i am a very open and sharing person and for some reason that's a terrible thing to be. I suppose stuffy and dull are more mainstream. Sigh, whatever. I suppose I've misunderstood the meaning of friendship. I'm learning friendship is only for good times. Hmm, I thought that's what strangers were good for. I suppose a shoulder to cry on or a listening ear is out of reach . Why on earth do I expect anyone to be there and support me through my trials and stress days. I mean it couldn't be because I do that for them. No there must be something very wrong with reaching out for answers and opinions from people you look up to and admire. I do wonder what to do with emotion since talking it out is right up there with pills and wine. One of the enigmas of life I suppose.

Outcomes

So, tomorrow I am required to take the "outcomes assessment" for Connors in order to receive my degree in May. It is a 4 hour comprehensive test similar to the ACT and there is no credit for it. It is solely for the purpose of Connors knowing what level of knowledge exiting students have. Well let's see here...over the past 3 years I can tell you about the handful of information I have retained from Connors State College. past a test who can remember any of this stuff. This mess of info that I will never use. Imaginary numbers...really? I;m going to be using imaginary numbers in my job but not their kind. So to say the least I'm a bit miffed about getting up early, not being able to take the girls to school, and spending 4 hours taking a test that I don't even get a grade for completing. I wonder if they'll let me take my big ole' Starbucks cup with me? I'm going to need some liquid power for this. FYI: CSC the outcome of 3 years of night classes, classes you said I'd need then didn't (a full years worth), and the sheer agony of putting up with a bunch of teenage morons and being lumped up in the group with them is this....God handle things on HIS time not mine, and I can do all things through Christ with enough prayer....and Starbucks.

Spring Break

Well spring break was amazing! Although now that I'm home I'm looking around thinking...oh jeez...I got to get this house in order. I cleaned before I left but I need to organize! I let stuff go during the school year and on every break i take a few days (the week) and put it all in it's place (if it has a place). So my brain is a mess when it's all over the place and this last half of the semester will make me or break me as it is my last for now. So with my house in order I can fully focus on my school work and get that darned degree I've been slowly working on for the last 3 years. Sigh. Today....is going to be a therapeutic day...Did I mention I'm going to get back to exercising today? Well.......maybe tomorrow, I just found a tub of Girl Scout Thin Mint Ice Cream in the freezer. Apparently Paul is not concerned with the junk in my trunk that jiggles like jello.

Natalie Grant - I Will Not Be Moved - Official Music Video

This video rocks! I love this song. It pumps me up every time I hear it. I love songs like this, let me know of some good ones!

Learning

We still love each other but we don't have to agree on things. That is the true test of unconditional love. I just smile, then go home and be thankful that I can turn from the drama. It clutters your life, makes you miserable, takes time from your family and craps on your blessings.

wonderfull words from a brilliant mind. I'll give her the credit when she gives me the ok.

I'm finding it super tough to not rub it in peoples face when I hear the dirt on them. If I don't want my business out there I don't tell it OR DO IT, but that's just me and that's the only person I can control. IT CRAPS ON YOUR BLESSINGS funnest and smartest thing I've ever heard. I love it.

Dirt

Now that I've ranted about what bugs me time to lighten things up a bit. Besides the fact that Paul & I are proud owners of dirt after a year of battling paper work I have a great find to share with all of you. A few years ago Paul brought home the vacuum I had been eyeballing at Lowes. A wonderful $150 Hoover something or other. Over the years it's done like all the others and bogged down to the point of not sucking which sucks when you have 3 kids. *HA HA HA* So we decided to just buy a new, cheap vac until i could talk him into a $700 Dyson...*HEE HEE HEE*. So off to Wally World we went to buy the cheapest vac we could find...OK the next to cheapest. A $42 Bissell. I LOVE IT! It's light, sucks the carpet off the floor and if it dies or gives up the ghost...WHO CARES! IT WAS ONLY $42! I might be putting off my $700 vac and be buying a new $42 cheepy every year or so! Just wanted to pass it along if your sucker isn't sucking cause I know it sucks. ;~)

2011

This year is going to be a busy year for our little house and today we felt the effects of all that on our shoulders. With tensions building and tempers trying to flair we decided to take a mini getaway. We shopped the kids to mom (all the way across the yard), enjoyed a glass (or two) of wine and decided tomorrow was going to be an us only day. So we all slept in (I got the girls around 12am) skipped church (even God rested) and layed around watching westerns all morning. We made an incredible enchilada lunch together, cleaned a little house together, and sent Paul to bed before work...together. It was nice to turn it all off and be...together. When daddy was asleep we snuck out and went to mom and dads for cake...it's my bday tomorrow.
This year is a life changing one. In with a new phase and out with one I'm quite accustom too and not ready to give up. After an entire year of paper work, lawyers and mess we are in the last and final step of buying 2 1/2 acres in our dream spot. After 11 years Paul and I are going back to California to visit friends, family, and spend our first real family vacation together with our girls. After 3 years of night classes and a mess of classes I didn't need I will graduate with my Associates degree in Pre Ed in May. After almost 8 years of being a stay at home mom I will be going back to work but this time doing what I love. After 8 years of raising babies....my youngest is starting school....there will be none left at home during the day....*insert bawling like a baby*. 
~ps...I'm pretty sure I started menopause this morning. WHY NOT AT THE RATE I'M GOING!! 

Haley

My third & last born. My lil bit, Hay Hay, brat. A ball of fire with all the qualifications of ADHD. Has her daddy's number. Get's just about everything she wants...a stereotypical spoiled baby of the family. Doesn't know a stranger, will hug, hit, and talk to anyone. God's way of teaching me patience. Will start school this fall...and that terrifies me. A heart bigger than Texas and a punch bigger Tyson. My little monkey. Third pregnancy (aweful, first case of morning sickness...still don't know why they call it MORNING sickness, gall bladder attacks), third delivery (c section, epidural malfunction, horrible) I was told after her to not take the chance of having another even though we so badly wanted one more...still do. Joy of my day, never seases to amaze me. Never a dull moment with this one, keeps me on my toes. Love's with all her heart, and shows you every chance she gets. My little munchkin this is my ode to you my love.

Lana

My second born. Miss boss. Vogt to the core. Will love you or hate you. Always on her best behavior. Sweet as pie and will show off when she's comfortable with you. Dancer and singer. Hugger and kisser. Doesn't care if she gets dirty and can eat like nobody's business. Country at heart, loves camo, camping, and anything outside. Doing great in school, wants to be a mom and Sunday School teacher. Said she wants to tell people about Jesus. How awesome is that! Cute as a button with dimples in her cheeks and a heart of Gold. THinks she's left out but is always right there with the rest of them. Love her to the core, she's my Lana Milana. She is every sense of the words cute, funny, and smart. My second pregancy (a little harder) second birth (first c section because the cord was around her neck 3 times) the joy of my day, breaks my heart to see you cry. Teen years will be hard with you because I will murder the boy who makes you cry.This is my ode to you Lana my love.

Trinity

My sweet first born. Emotional, cocky, diva. The do-er of everything. Hides her love, is shy and always gets a good report. I've been told she needs to be cloned. She's neat and tidy, the best kid a mom could ask for...goes to bed before 8pm awake and dressed before 7am. Not quite a leader but knows when to stand her ground. Wants to be a Vet, Teacher, Fashion Designer and Mom. My first of everything, each day is a learning experience with her. First pregnancy (easy), first labor (natural, no meds, lasted around 2 days). A truely great spirit, until a sister takes her toys. Was an only child for 3 years...and likes her alone time....has offered to give away her sisters. I love you Trin Trin and this is my ode to you my love. 

Puppies

3 years ago we adopted Cassie. Her mother is a beautiful white husky with blue eyes. Her father is a handsom chocolate lab. Cassie looks & acts like a husky with her daddies loyalty and chocolate color & mommas blue eyes. She's my 4th girl, I love her...except her husky ways of roaming. We have been keeping her tied since October when she climbed the fence, ran the neighborhood for a month & was returned by a neighbor with a nasty wound on her side....& pregnant. in December we were blessed with 8 babies, sadly 2 died at birth. We found a great home for one of the boys & have 5 left for our amusment. 2 we are keeping, Pretty Girl who is black brown & white with georgous green eyes, & Blue who has a half blue eye & blue heeler specks like her daddy. We wanted to keep the other boy, Bolt, but have decided the girls are better behaved. So Bolt & his 2 twin sisters have to go. Bolt has his momas blue eyes & is solid white. The girls are solid white & are two peas in a pod. HOWEVER, the three of them are so husky it's unreal. They escape daily, climb,dig,whine,jump,destroy everything, & need to find a new home. My 2 little girls just lay around & chill like their dad...I love them. So today as the sun peeked out & started the thawing process. In dog terms that ment runn for the hills & bark like there is no tomorrow. As of this moment  I feel like I have 3 toddlers in my back yard. I'm praying they are asleep & to afraid to look. I found someone who wants Bolt & will meet with her tomorrow...whew, 1 down 2 to go. I need a hot bath & some of that "me time" I was talking about yesterday PRONTO. So that was my day in a nutt shell. The girls are out of school tomorrow...YAY! But I have class...BOO! Glad all my works done! ;~)

Habits...

Habits are hard to break. I have broken some and have some I need to break. I have one habit that is the hardest thing I've ever had to correct...temper. But, while I work on that BIG one I'm knocking out some small ones. We've had record setting snow fall in Oklahoma this past couple weeks and so the girls and I have been out of school. For some reason I have gotten a TON of stuff finished. All those little annoying projects like going through the clothes, toys, junk drawers. I've even managed to get all my homework done along with rewrite all my notes and study...if you know me you know that's a feat. I have realized that I am more organized than I thought! I am perfectly capable of being a good student! I just need to find the time. I have been able to take the time to get my house in order ~ a house that is severely passed up by the hustle and bustle of daily life. Once that was done (office not included, I know) I was able to sit and enjoy my homework. It wasn't nearly as stressful! Thankfully we got another few inches of snow today so I was able to get new assignments done and tomorrow will be dedicated to tackling that office. (I've said it out loud therefore it must be done). So it's time to break out the ole appointment book and pencil in some me time. I did this most of the semester last fall but lost in the office is my new planner for 2011. Let's see what the bible says about "me time"... 
3 John 1:2 Beloved, I pray that all may go well with you and that you may be in good health, as it goes well with your soul.
Just like I daily focus on the Word for strength...I need to daily focus on myself to evaluate. It's critical to reflect on where we stand and where we are to improve to be more like HIM. That, for me, requires a long hot bath.... ;~)

I'm new...

So hubby is off to work, kiddos in bed, snow rolling this way across the state. Thanks to my wonderful Aunt (in law) I have been inspired to blog. Now I just have to figure out how to do it. I've been playing with the idea of starting a journal to clear my mind so this may be just what I need. Now, to figure out how to design this to look like something...I guess I'll search the web for ideas and see if I can't rummage up something pretty to look at. I have lots of great pics I'd like to show off but for some reason it only wants to post the entire album in lue of my fave snap shot. Sigh, I need a destressor these days...I hope this is it. Although I found myself lost in my Sunday School readings this afternoon. I'm just waist deep in Sheparding A Childs Heart and all the support it provides. In a book teaching me how to parent to please the Lord I have found such encouragement for my present situation. A situation that can only be resolved by the Lords hand. My "to do" list is made up of 2 things....
1. Serve the Lord
2. De-stress
Of course there are many other things on that list but those are my focus right now. "Do all things to the glory of the Lord." I'm not sure where this blog will lead but I hope someone will enjoy my ramblings. I'll enjoy getting them out of my brain....LOL